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Book Buzz: Keep the Siblings, Lose the Rivalry

Book Buzz: Keep the Siblings, Lose the Rivalry

If you are the parent of more than one child, you need this book.

Child psychologist and experienced parent, Dr. Todd Cartmell, offers insight into the root of sibling squabbles and provides a plan for dealing positively and effectively with them, in his book Keep the Siblings, Lose the Rivalry (©2003 Zondervan).

“Positive communication and problem-solving skills don’t come naturally to most children,” states Dr. Cartmell. “Thus, if children have not been taught these skills, there is no reason to think that they will magically work things out in a respectful way when left to resolve difficult conflicts on their own.”

In other words, parents, it is our job to teach our children the important skills for handling and resolving conflict in respectful ways. None of us comes into this world “just knowing” how to do this. We must practice it at home! And it is through this practice that our children’s “living-together skills” will grow and develop. They will learn to have respectful sibling relationships, which will then translate into having respectful relationships with people outside of the family. We must remember, however, that these skills are difficult and take much time to learn. Practice is essential to learning, and that practice needs to come within the safety of our homes and families, where we parents can offer instruction and counsel.

Keep the Siblings, Lose the Rivalry is easy to read and is full of practical, step-by-step advice, which gives parents the confidence they need to guide their children through sibling conflicts. Within the book, Dr. Cartmell offers guidance that revolves around these ten practical steps for turning your kids into teammates:

  • Create a strong family bond
  • Connect with each child
  • Eliminate comparing, labeling, and competition
  • Require sibling respect
  • Improve sibling communication
  • Step toward solutions
  • Teach sibling survival skills
  • Reinforce positive sibling behavior
  • Use sibling consequences that work
  • Put them on the same team

In addition, Dr. Cartmell provides questions for reflection, object lessons, family time discussion guides, prayer suggestions, “Practice Makes Perfect” exercises, family activities, real-life examples from his own family and from his child psychology practice, problem-solving sheets, “For a Laugh” snippets, and more!

Parents, do yourselves–and your family–a favor and order this book right away.

Carrie Bevell Partridge has read a lot of parenting books over the years, and this is one of her favorites.

Additional books by Dr. Todd Cartmell:

The Parent Survival Guide (©2001 Zondervan)

Respectful Kids (©2006 NavPress)

Project Dad (©2011 Revell)

Raising Flexible Kids (©2014 Todd Cartmell)

*All books are available through

Follow Dr. Todd Cartmell:

Facebook– @Dr. Todd Cartmell

Twitter– @ToddCartmell



About The Author

Carrie Partridge

Carrie Bevell Partridge grew up in Memphis, TN with her parents and four siblings. She attended Mississippi College, where she met her husband Kevin. They have been married for 20 years and have five children. They live in Ridgeland, MS. Carrie has written the “Growth Spurts” column and managed social media for Parents & Kids Magazine since 2011. You can read more of her work at and

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